The Hungry Runner Girl: Cookies and Self-Worth

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Cookies and Self-Worth

What better way to start a post than with an easy and AMAZINGLY cookie recipe.

I know you have had no-bake cookies before and seen them a million times but these one's are different. No chocolate?!?! I was skeptical too and called the cutest Allison a traitor for not including the most important ingredient.

I took a bite and died. The best no-bake cookies I have ever had. I really don't know how I went 25 years without these gems.

I made up for the lack of them in my life by downing more cookies than I care to admit.

I am too lazy to actually type the recipe so here is a picture of the pink panther magic slip of goodness:)

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Sometimes I wonder why it is so easy for me to tell you EVERYTHING....I have no shame in opening up on hungryrunnergirl because I have learned that 99% of you know EXACTLY what I am feeling and hopefully I help at least one person know they are NOT alone:)

I talk about the HUNGRY part and the RUNNER part a lot but every now and then I need to throw in the GIRL part.

WIth the lack of running (I know I am pathetic and missing it after only 4 days without it) my self-esteem starts to suffer a little bit. My positivity about myself starts to fade a little bit and clearly I am addicted to those endorphins. Running gives me a sense of accomplishment, it is something that I can do that makes me feel special, it helps me to feel alive and like I am the bomb.com

So without it, I start feeling like I am not as 'good' of a person as I am when I am running many miles every day. I know it sounds ridiculous saying it out loud (or typing it) but I am just being honest.

After my 27 miler on Saturday I didn't even notice my acne or the fact that I ate 139 grams of sugar within 15 minutes.......it didn't matter because I felt so good about my running accomplishment and that nothing could bring me down.

My main point is that we can't base our self-worth on Running, Exercise, Appearance, a New Outfit or our Job. Sure those things make us feel good about ourselves but we can't let them define us.

What happens if we get injured and can't run or workout? How will we feel about ourselves when we get attacked with acne (yes, I am referring to myself right now)? Do we think we aren't a good person when we don't have enough mula for a cute new outfit/make-up/getting our hair did or if our muffin tops are a little bit more fluffy than they were last year at this time? What if our boss tells us to re-do a project we have worked on for months or we get a C on a test........are we then worthless?

I have no idea if this makes any sense. I am not trying to lecture but more talk myself through figuring out where to truly base my self worth from. Basically, I am forcing you to follow my journey of growing up:)

I just want to say that how much we are worth does not depend on superficial things like how far we can run, ugly scrunched face photos, a silly number on a scale or what grade we get because all of that can CHANGE overnight and we have no way to prevent it.

What we can base our self-WORTH on:

1-How we treat others and our relationships with them, how we try to make OTHER'S lives BETTER than they were before they met us.

2-Faith. No matter what religion you are I think that believing in a Higher-Being and knowing that HE loves us unconditionally helps us to realize how much we are WORTH (okay, crying onto my keyboard as I type this during my lunch break.....I have issues).

3-Our Integrity and making good decisions that go along with our values and morals.

4-Accomplishments......if you can't do what you 'normally' do to feel accomplishment than find something new that helps you feel like you are ridiculously awesome.

5-Deep down we know how awesome we are.......try to find that and spend time each day finding that inner peace.

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1. Do you ever find yourself basing your self-WORTH on things that are superficial (our weight, looks, what the media tells us we should be or how many miles we can run etc)?

2. Anything to add to my list of where to find true self-worth? Help a sister out:)

3. What was the last food item you were skeptical about but then turned out to be amazing!?!?!

-I was worried that the lack of chocolate in the cookies were going to be a deal-breaker but it turned out to be my favorite. Over Christmas break I tried bacon for the first time in a long time because I thought it was nasty.....turns out it is one of my favorites:)

126 Comments:

At March 16, 2011 at 3:28 PM , Danielle said...: OMG I just may go make these cookies right now!!!!
At March 16, 2011 at 3:29 PM , Margaret Bussan said...: Oh, Janae, you are so wise. I am so glad that I read this post. It just lifted my spirits before I have to spend 4 hours telling parents what their fifth grade son or daughter needs to improve on before middle school!

You are FABULOUS in every way.
At March 16, 2011 at 3:32 PM , Nelly said...: "WIth the lack of running (I know I am pathetic and missing it after only 4 days without it) my self-esteem starts to suffer a little bit. My positivity about myself starts to fade a little bit and clearly I am addicted to those endorphins. Running gives me a sense of accomplishment, it is something that I can do that makes me feel special, it helps me to feel alive and like I am the bomb.com"

This paragraph is dead on! If I'm injured, I don't seem to feel as happy about things, and definitely feel off. You will get better soon!
At March 16, 2011 at 3:37 PM , hailey said...: you are so amazing! the fact that you can be so open and honest is one of the greatest things about you and this blog. For me, I base too much of my self worth on school grades, how long or hard i exercise, and my weight - which I am desperately trying to work on. I think we get so caught up in comparing ourselves to other people that we forget to remember how special and unique we all are, and that it doesn't matter if we're as good as someone else. All that matters is we're trying to be our best selves. Thanks for another perfect post!

oh, and on the food - I can't even remember what foods I have been skeptical about because pretty sure I eat anything :)
At March 16, 2011 at 3:38 PM , Dorry said...: Oh my sweet Janae! I have so much to say about this. I'm proud of you for being so honest and insightful! I'm going to email you now. :) Big hugs to you! xoxo
At March 16, 2011 at 3:39 PM , trisha*n said...: This was exactly what I needed. My body and my mind were super tired and down this week. I didn't do well on a test or get as many miles in as I wanted. But there is more to me than those things! Thanks for reminding me. You are amazing!
At March 16, 2011 at 3:43 PM , Emz said...: I just want to say amen.
that's all I've got.

this. post. rocks.
At March 16, 2011 at 3:45 PM , Carrie said...: You ROCK. No, you really do. There are so many people in your life who love you, value you and admire you for all that you already are - myself included!!

I can totally relate to how you feel. I've struggled with self-esteem my whole life, and when I couldn't run for two months this winter, I was super bummed. Like, really bummed.

However, I love your list. I think faith and accomplishments and making other people happy is SO important. When I'm feeling sad or sucky, one other thing I do is I make a list of things I am grateful for. By the time I am done, I usually have a big smile on my face, because I've been reminded of just how blessed I am, and how itty-bitty my problems are in the grand scheme of things.

Also, another thing that's important to remember: what you AREN'T doing. You aren't running yourself into the ground and hurting yourself. You aren't turning a couple of days of not running into a catastrophe. You aren't avoiding foods and people that you love. You're not bottling up these bad feelings until they get worse inside. So you're already winning in my books :)
At March 16, 2011 at 3:46 PM , Jess said...: Oh my dear beautiful Janae. This is HARD stuff. HARD. As in, you won't find the answers overnight. I am so encouraged to see that you are searching for them though! You are amazing at so many things in life! Keep up the fight girl! We all love you to pieces!
At March 16, 2011 at 3:48 PM , Unknown said...: I ABSOLUTELY know what you mean.... after a few days of NOT running, I feel my self-esteem take a nose-dive. You ARE NOT ALONE! And you are amazing.

We are not defined by the number of miles we run, how much we weigh, what we ate, or the pimples that pop up on our faces. We've all been there. Don't let it get you down.

And I will be making those cookies ASAP.
At March 16, 2011 at 3:48 PM , Jess @ Blonde Ponytail said...: I have so much to comment on--I was nodding as was reading this if that's any indication. I do have to say I love the Baja pic of you--scrunchy faces rule!

#1 is such a valid point and you illustrate this daily through your posts--I feel like we are virtual besties as I'm sure your other readers do too. #2 is HUGE and--evident you are passinate about your faith as well.

You are such an inspiration as a person, Janae. Running and Candy aside.
At March 16, 2011 at 3:49 PM , Geneviève said...: I needed this post today.
I have to redo an assignment for school that I spent so much time on and thought I did good on... This has been happening a lot this semester and I just feel so dumb and worthless... School is supposed to be my "job" and I'm completing my masters so I'm *supposed* to be good at it. So when I don't succeed, it really crushes me and I just get so down on myself... Thanks for the reminder that I need to work on this.
At March 16, 2011 at 3:49 PM , Breann Clawson said...: i'm a SOOO happy about this post! this happened to me this morning! after my 10 miles on saturday i've been limping with a bad knee since and took a few days off and could barely run 3 miles today! but this makes me feel sooo much better! and im also making these cookies while i type!
At March 16, 2011 at 3:49 PM , Emma (Sweet Tooth Runner said...: This post is AMAZING!! I love you for it:)

And a big AMEN to number 2 sister!! "God loves us not for the numbers on our Garmins" <--- A woman at my last race was wearing a sign pinned to her shirt saying that, and I couldn't agree more!!

All I can say is that YOU are one of the most awesome and inspirational people I know, and that I think what should make YOU feel 'worthy' is that you help others (like me, the billions of other readers, the people in your classes, etc) to feel better about ourselves. And THAT is really something:)
At March 16, 2011 at 3:50 PM , Anonymous said...: This is amazing in every way!!! I used to base my self worth on the dumbest things..(Clothes, weight, looks, etc) But as I've gotten older, these things seem less important. Sure, I want to look good. But to look good, I need to feel good, and being myself and standing for my beliefs helps me achieve that! Everyone has bad days, but I really try to not let a "fat day" bring me down!
At March 16, 2011 at 3:50 PM , Samantha said...: wow, this is such perfect timing for me after I wrote my post last night about how Im frustrated/mad at myself for not doing my training well right now. http://www.mamanotes.com/2011/03/three-months-self-talk.html

thank you for this. I need to focus on all the other things that make me a GOOD person!
At March 16, 2011 at 3:51 PM , whatkateiscooking said...: Amen!!
At March 16, 2011 at 3:55 PM , Anonymous said...: Beautifully written Janae. I love how you are just so real. I have felt so many of the emotions that you are writing. I am nursing a small injury too and I have been restricting my food intake because I haven't been able to run as much. Because if I'm not xxx lbs than I am unworthy. Thank you for reminding me that I am worth so much more than I give myself credit for! A huge part of identity is in my faith in Christ but my earthly mind forgets that sometimes :-)
I think these cookies are just what I need tonight!!
You are amazing!!
At March 16, 2011 at 3:55 PM , Stephanie F said...: good call, girl. you're a smart cookie.
At March 16, 2011 at 3:58 PM , Brandy said...: Your blog is so popular because you are so honest and open! :)
Latest food item I had hesitations about was HEARTS OF PALM. They look so weird. But OMG. Delicious! :-D
At March 16, 2011 at 3:58 PM , XLMIC said...: This is such a sweet post. This is why we all follow you :)
At March 16, 2011 at 4:02 PM , Unknown said...: beautifully said girl! As soon as I start to feel blah, I turn to God and as him for guidance. I take time to go to yoga, and spend more time with love ones. SOmetimes we just need to get over ourselves. Share the love! You are amazing, I really respect you.
LC
At March 16, 2011 at 4:05 PM , Anonymous said...: Lovely post, Janae. : )
At March 16, 2011 at 4:05 PM , Meghan said...: What a great post. Totally agree.

Amen!
At March 16, 2011 at 4:06 PM , Bess@Bess Be Fit said...: This post takes a lot of courage Janae! Its definitely something I struggle with sometimes...I can easily get caught up with the number on the scale and feel like its constantly a lifelong battle of trying to be better all the time! Being happy with the ones you love is what I try to focus on because I know they don't care what I weigh or what I look like!! Love you sweet girl! great post!
At March 16, 2011 at 4:08 PM , Laura @ Meet Virginia said...: Ooh must make those cookies! Do you think it would be ok to add chocolate chips? :) Can't live without it!

Loved and needed this post! I have been thinking about that a lot recently - we are SO much more than what we look like!!!
At March 16, 2011 at 4:09 PM , Tara @ Dashing in Pearls said...: It's like you were in my head when I was shopping today!! I was concerned with finding a cute green shirt for St. Patricks day tomorrow when in reality it's nice to look cute but no one will remember what I'm wearing tomorrow but they will remember how I made them feel (loved, ignored, significant, etc.).

This is a great post. Thank you for not only being an encouragement in the running department but in the life department!
At March 16, 2011 at 4:11 PM , Sarah Corrigan said...: Aw man, thank you for being so honest! I feel the EXACT same way whenever I take a break from running (I mean, down to the acne and all, UGH). Thank you for reminding me that I will not find happiness in any of things --- and that truly only He can provide me with happiness that will fulfill me forever! :)
At March 16, 2011 at 4:12 PM , Lisa said...: Dang, I can relate to you on this (especially the skin thing!). I remind myself that I'm not my skin... and I know I'm a bit older than you, but I can say that investigating the causes of acne can work over time...even though it doesn't always seem like there is hope.
Running does seem to create an escape, doesn't it?!
At March 16, 2011 at 4:15 PM , EBURNS said...: My pastor said to me once, "let someone else be the judge of whether your day was worth it or not." let God live through you Janae, and rest knowing you'll never know all you did for others today. I have said it before and I will say it again, this blog has had a profound impact on people who are total strangers to you. You make a difference everyday!

I used to freak out when my self esteem slipped, was almost impulsive to fix it......go for a run, do something for someone else, doll up, eat super clean diet, or find my favorite treat.....now I just recognize my self esteem has slipped, and know this too will pass.....it always has.

enjoy your night. and if you can't stop thinking about it post again tonight. We are here for you girl!
At March 16, 2011 at 4:15 PM , Lindsey @ Textbooks and Cookbooks said...: Awesome post!!
At March 16, 2011 at 4:19 PM , Sabrina @ Radioactive Runner said...: I love how open you are Janae.. you are so inspirational for so many!!
You are so not alone on feeling this way and I think there are a lot of people that struggle with finding that balance and really focusing on our self-worth.

Keep writing.. because I totally enjoy following your journey!
At March 16, 2011 at 4:24 PM , CaitlinR said...: I love you, Janae! I was having a rough day workwise and this really helped me change my attitude. You should try reading The Power of Positive Thinking by Normal Vincent Peale. It is basically a book about being positive in your day to day life, with a religious spin. I love it! Let me know if you try it!
At March 16, 2011 at 4:25 PM , Anonymous said...: It is really difficult to sit with ourselves. We build our identities through things we find enjoyment in, like running, eating well, exercising, interacting with others, etc..and when that's gone, if even temporarily, we just have our raw selves. It's not easy, it's not comfortable, and it can be painful. I know it leaves me feeling a little lost, anxious and restless. Kudos to you for bringing it to awareness, being vocal about it, and attempting to tackle it! Oh, and helping me think about my own self-awareness. :)
At March 16, 2011 at 4:26 PM , casprincipessa said...: I started to read your blog about a month ago, and this is my first comment :) Anyway, I agree with you. The past two months I have been injured and couldn't run more than 20-25 miles on a good week. I have beat myself up during these past few months and been my own worst enemy because I feel like a failure. I forget to remind myself of all my other accomplishments. Today I ran my first 6 miles in a LONG time without any pain!!!
At March 16, 2011 at 4:32 PM , Anonymous said...: this is such an awesome post! i've been struggling with running a lot and letting my performance affect how i feel about my life as a whole and it's really been getting me down. thank you so much for the reminder :)
At March 16, 2011 at 4:39 PM , Madison Michele said...: thank you janae! all my love <3
At March 16, 2011 at 4:54 PM , Rick and Nikki said...: Oh Janae - is it weird this post just made me cry on my laptop? You are so special Janae. You are such a wonderful woman, filled with joy, service and the Spirit of Christ. I know you don't know me, but I love you. Don't let yourself get down - remember tomorrow is a new day, a new opportunity to be the person who you want to be. So maybe you can't run - lose yourself in the service of others. Charity never faileth.
I think this may be one of my favorite quotes. I read it ever time I can't take the trials anymore

“Patience is not passive resignation, nor is it failing to act because of our fears. Patience means active waiting and enduring. It means staying with something and doing all that we can—working, hoping, and exercising faith; bearing hardship with fortitude, even when the desires of our hearts are delayed. Patience is not simply enduring; it is enduring well!”

-Dieter F. Uchdorf

Stay close to your Heavenly Father and remember this too shall pass
At March 16, 2011 at 4:55 PM , Lisa J said...: 1. those cookies look amazing- recently gave up dairy for lent so its been fun modifying recipes (and unfortunately chocolate is dairy)

2. I do health coaching for a living and you HIT THE NAIL on the HEAD with finding what defines your self worth. So many people use their activity level or body image as a defining point, and then if something happens to their 'defining point' it all downspirals from there and its hard to hit goals and stay positive.

GREAT POST
At March 16, 2011 at 4:56 PM , Stefanie D. said...: I am struggling with this very thing right now! I can't run either, and I've had to take a deeper look at the things that really make me happy. I spend so many hours obsessing over running/fitness/food, I forget that there are other things that are important in my life as well.

I think that family definitely needs to be on the list. :) When I'm at my lowest, I know that I can always go to my sisters, and they listen to my nonsense and make me feel like I am worth something.
At March 16, 2011 at 5:04 PM , Runners Fuel said...: I always feel better about myself if I run that day. Further I go, the better I feel. I will always feel that way. I know exactly what you mean!
At March 16, 2011 at 5:05 PM , Rick and Nikki said...: Also, watch this - I think I've watched it like 50x. I'm sure you've seen it, or at least heard of her. But every time I've see it, it puts things back in perspective for me!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KHDvxPjsm8E
At March 16, 2011 at 5:06 PM , Samantha said...: This post is wonderful! We often need to be reminded that sooo many different things make us who we are...not just one or two. So if a couple aspects aren't going well at the moment, focus on the others b/c more than likely we'll find that they've picked up the slack :)
At March 16, 2011 at 5:10 PM , Lizzi said...: 1. Absolutely. I'm with you - I began to get so 'into' running/exercise/fitness that I started feeling like it defined me. If I didn't smash out an incredible workout at the gym or go for crazy mountain runs every day, I began to feel like I was a failure. This was all tied up in a lot of old issues too.. with being fat, ugly, unpopular, etc etc. It all became interwoven in my brain so that eventually I couldn't separate exercising from being 'a worthwhile person'. WHICH IS REALLY SAD! It's still something I struggle with (hate admitted that but gotta keep it real!) but i am FIGHTING IT every day :)

2. Love your list. Pretty much in line with mine. I'm not religious, but you know what my 'higher being' is?? MY MOTHER! hahah dorky but true. Whenever I feel really down on myself, I remember her complete, unconditional love for me. She doesn't care one bit if I'm fat, unfit, ugly or stupid.. she just loves me anyway. It really reassures me that I'm an okay person :) awww and now I'M crying too!!

3. Last surprise AMAZING meal was a wrap I bought from the cafe at work. They were out of the ingredients for the one I wanted, so I randomly picked another. I was honestly not expecting much and was really bummed I couldnt get the one I originally want. But it was INCREDIBLEEEE. Tandoori chicken, cream cheese, mango chutney. oh my godddd it changed my life and has now become my staple when I have my weekly splurge and buy lunch :D
At March 16, 2011 at 5:15 PM , misszippy said...: Um, yes, I discovered a lot about how I view myself w/o running. I think what bothered me the most was that being practically sedentary made me the person I never wanted to be. I see all these people who choose to be inactive and unhealthy and I am NOT one of them. And yet I was for a while due to injury and it bugged the HECK out of me! It's tough...you're doing a great job though!
At March 16, 2011 at 5:15 PM , Jessica said...: I also needed this post today as I'm having IT band issues and I'm taking the week off after dealing with it for about a month. Without running I feel lost....so I've been trying to focus on other things...your blog always helps....I love to read it multiple times a day...thanks for the encouraging words and the humor, we all need it!
At March 16, 2011 at 5:24 PM , Anonymous said...: mmm thanks for this, janae. i got a bit of disappointing news today so i needed to hear this! you're the best & i'm sure you'll be back running again soon! just get well now :)
At March 16, 2011 at 5:26 PM , Anonymous said...: Great post! My self worth is based on knowing that I am a child of God :) And God doesn't make junk.
That revelation helped me immenseley.

It is still hard to not base our worth on other stuff!!

Last amazing thing i had that I didn't think I would like? peanut butter!!
At March 16, 2011 at 5:29 PM , my little celebration said...: Great post. On my low self worth days, I try to do something that makes me feel good like go for a long walk outside, listen to happy music, or journal to try and process my feelings. But more importantly, as you already mentioned, my faith in Christ is the only thing that ultimately gives me worth and hope in this life.
At March 16, 2011 at 5:35 PM , Anonymous said...: Hey! I just found your blog a few days ago, first time commenting! I know what you mean, I've struggled with this self-worth thing and it didn't come out to the surface til not too long ago. We put our self worth on things that are so ever changing, like grades, acne (boo!), and relationships. I am still a work in progress :) The one thing I always have to remember is that those things don't define who I am! I came to realization that Gods love is sufficient for me. It's not easy though, I can't just say that I conquered that mindset, the first thing I had to do was dig deep into why I felt that way about myself and I learned A LOT stemmed from my past issues.

"It should be that of your inner-self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight."- 1Peter3:4
At March 16, 2011 at 5:57 PM , Connie @ its the cookie monster! said...: im always rating myself based on those things. i feel that no matter what i can't compare to others and comparing myself to them just makes me feel smaller. i think im a pretty good baker and runner but then i also know that there are better ppl out there. but you're right! we shouldn't damage ourselves like that cuz there are other things to focus on!
At March 16, 2011 at 5:58 PM , Anonymous said...: THANK YOU for this post! seriously. let's just say that i've been relying too much of my worth on superficial things lately (running, how many hours i can work etc) and this is exactly what i needed to read today / this week to snap me back :)
At March 16, 2011 at 6:00 PM , Anonymous said...: Thanks for the cookie recipe! :D

I know exactly what you mean! I think that it can be so easy to base our worth on what we accomplish in a day that we overlook all of the good things about who we are as people.
At March 16, 2011 at 6:03 PM , Anonymous said...: Thanks for being so honest! Sometimes I find myself bashing my running because I am not as fast as others, but then, I realize how I don't deserve to treat myself like that. Faith definitely helps, as well as turning to friends & family who always manage to make me feel better about myself. I like to look at pictures or remember how awesome I am. Thanks for sharing this and making me think about my self-worth!
At March 16, 2011 at 6:08 PM , runkatie said...: You are so great Janae. Thank you for the uplifting post!
At March 16, 2011 at 6:09 PM , Anonymous said...: Wow, as awful as it is, I am SO relieved other people feel like this. I am on week 5 of a groin pull, which means NO running and having to drop out of my first marathon. I have felt pretty terrible about myself since, and it made me realize how I had put way too much emphasis on running being "my" thing and I was/am completely lost without it. Thanks so much for posting this. I feel a little better!
At March 16, 2011 at 6:28 PM , Unknown said...: You're dead on! We need to find other things to base our self worth on besides the things you can see in the mirror. Love this post!
At March 16, 2011 at 6:28 PM , dear willow, said...: Aww i love u love u love u for being so real!!!!! It took me years to surrender to the hold that self worth thru "things" had on me. God for sure is what fills me up and who i find my worth in. Cuz He made me :) :)
At March 16, 2011 at 6:31 PM , Meg said...: I love love love this post! it just made my night - especially since I've been really sick for a week and haven't been able to RUN or SWIM or anything else!! this was just what I needed.
At March 16, 2011 at 6:35 PM , Mallory said...: Great blog!! I love it! I know it's tough to feel good when you can't work out. It sucks! But stick with feeling GOOD about yourself because YOU rock, Janae!! I love what you said about Faith. It's so true. I am a very spiritual person and I truly ENJOY going to church. Everyone needs to find strength from above.

I definitely get negative abotu myself sometimes. It's usually over stupid stuff like "my hair isn't cooperating," "I didn't run today," or "I have acne on my face." Silly stuff like that. I gotta remember that I'm pretty great.

To add to your self-worth... well, YOU motivate people and make them feel good about themselves, even when they're having a crummy day. So, you are a great friend even thought I don't actually know you.
At March 16, 2011 at 6:44 PM , Pam @ herbieontherun.com said...: I've got nothing to add that everyone else that has commented hasn't already said a hundred times over.

Just know that I think you're an amazing person, whether or not you ever run another step. I do believe in a higher power, and he shines through you with every post. <3
At March 16, 2011 at 6:44 PM , Corey @ the runners cookie said...: Janae, I can totally relate! Sometimes a bad run, some negative feedback from someone at work, or a grad program rejection letter can really hurt and get me down. (Also, I struggle with acne and some days I let that bother me WAY more than it should). I think just those things you listed, to think about our relationships, our faith, who we are as human beings, is so helpful in getting rid of those feelings. It also helps me to call my parents, or someone who can remind me that my worth is not based on any of those things, to do yoga which helps me be in the moment and remember that life is so much more than running, physical appearance, and grades. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts through this post <3
At March 16, 2011 at 6:52 PM , Beth said...: It is good to read that you are trying to find your worth beyond running. I especially agree with number 1. Think about how many people you reach with this blog and how you make them feel better.
At March 16, 2011 at 6:58 PM , Lauren said...: This post is amazing.
I've been having a rough time these past couple weeks with self-esteem and this post is something that I really needed to read.
Thank you so much. :)
Oh! And I just became a follower, too! :D
At March 16, 2011 at 7:08 PM , Rene said...: I have a tendency to downplay my accomplishments because they might not be as impressive as other's. I wouldn't even call myself a runner because I wasn't fast. My husband helped me overcome that issue.
Besides the things you listed I think service helps with self esteem. I always feel good when I can help someone.
The first time I tried sweet potatoes was about 5 years ago. I love them.
At March 16, 2011 at 7:09 PM , Diet Coke and a Lemon said...: This spoke so deeply to me. We all need to be reminded of where our self worth comes from. It is so easily forgotten.
At the end of the day it just comes down to our actions and how we treated others that day.
At March 16, 2011 at 7:25 PM , chelsey @ clean eating chelsey said...: I love how honest you are. It makes me love you so much more. :) I definitely have those feeling sometimes of not being of much "worth" because I "wasn't good enough" didn't "do enough" or someone "did it better". I think we all just need to remember your tips, especially about faith!
At March 16, 2011 at 7:26 PM , Amy said...: It is comforting to know that so many people face the same issue, as well as a little sad that we still place so much importance on a number or a reflection in the mirror. I find that I beat myself up when I don't go to the gym or run or eat too much peanut butter and it is a conscious effort to remember that those things really shouldn't define me as a person and I shouldn't judge my self worth from how much I weigh or how many miles I have run.
My sister is the one who helps to pull me out of these moments and tell me that she has always thought I am beautiful no matter what I weigh or what I eat. I was truly sent an angel in her.
I am glad to be on this journey of learning about self worth with so many other strong wonderful women.
We are all beautiful.
At March 16, 2011 at 7:49 PM , Gracie said...: We're doing an awesome Bible study on idols - like, what we make our idols - and I was struck when I read that people make DOING WELL an idol. It's good in and of itself, but we make doing good things and being good at stuff our idol. I thought, I do that! And once it's my idol I base my worth on it. I made a mistake at work once and couldn't sleep all night.
At March 16, 2011 at 7:53 PM , Running Ricig said...: You are seriously awesome no matter how many miles you run. I look forward to reading your blog everyday not because of you mileage but because of your personality!

Those cookies look AWESOME! Weekend baking project.
At March 16, 2011 at 8:00 PM , ash & diz said...: Can i please come give you a big squeeze RIGHT now? You are such a tough lil cookie and i know you are having a hard (hard!) time with not being able to run. You are going to get better, you will ROCK/KICK A$$ & take names at Boston. I believe in you girlfriend!

As for your questions; 1. Yes, I often base my self worth on my appearance and more so, my weight. I constantly compare myself to others and find myself lacking in many areas. Boo! I hate low self esteem. 2. Your list sums it up pretty well. Have to say, since I've been hanging out with you and all the awesome, amazing other girls, I've been feeling lots better. 3. I used to think that spinach and broccoli in eggs would be nasty! Ha! Silly me. Now i don't eat eggs without them. :)

Love ya gorgeous. Cheer up!
At March 16, 2011 at 8:04 PM , Maria said...: Lovely post! I know exactly how you feel, all of your "ramblings" made complete and total sense. I feel off with even just one rest day, longer than that I get a bit antsy. But you are so right, nothing material makes our self-worth and you are totally awesome with or without running!
At March 16, 2011 at 8:08 PM , Unknown said...: I have always enjoyed your blog but I would have to say this is definitely my favorite post and probably just what I needed to read today. Thank you!
At March 16, 2011 at 8:20 PM , Anonymous said...: Cute, thoughtful, inspiring post, Janae! I love it!!

And if you would have told me I would grow to love squash as much as I do (after trying it for the first time last year) I would have called you a liar...
At March 16, 2011 at 8:32 PM , Anonymous said...: Amen sistah friend....glad to see you use your blog to help you flip the switch and help others like me.
At March 16, 2011 at 8:37 PM , Caroline said...: you KNOW I get how you feel. Sadly we live in a HARD society. it is true. We are lucky to live in this country and have freedome that is for sure. But this society is hard especially for us gals. Everyone need to matter and to be seen. and we think it takes a mountain to get that, when it really does not.

so on #1: honest answer is YES. I wish it was no.

on #2: it will come for you I hope because I think you will fantastic: for me it is how I raise my kids. they are a reflexion of me. and once they go to school you get a good report on how you are doing as a parent. I am not just talking about grades here. My #1 goal for my whole life is to raise GOOD MEN. Every day that I think I am on the right path, it is good for my self worth.

When you get to be a mom the stuff at #1 are less and less important I think, but they are still there...
At March 16, 2011 at 8:37 PM , Unknown said...: Great post Nae! Very impressed with the part about self worth. (and no-bake cookies).

Love, Your bro
At March 16, 2011 at 8:40 PM , Adrianna said...: incredible post chica. i love this blog, your message, and i thank you for bringing this to me today. i can always use a reminder to stop feeling sh*tty about not 'doing enough' physically, mentally, work-wise...its really all about personal growth, doing good for others, and just being genuine. i'm uber guilty of focusing on superficial things in reflection to self worth. so not true!
bless you :)
At March 16, 2011 at 8:42 PM , Jessica said...: I totally understand where you are coming from. For the longest time I beat myself up over how I looked and used exercise as a tool for weight loss only. But when I discovered running as a sport, I found myself caring much more about my times and distances than the number on the scale. I even stopped weighing myself becausea my sense of accomplishment and self-worth now comes from my runs.

At the same time, I now feel bad about myself if I skip a run or if I don't run as fast or as far as I wanted to. I really like this post because it reminds me that my self-confidence should not be based on the scale OR my runs.

I really like your self-worth list! Thanks for sharing :)
At March 16, 2011 at 8:56 PM , Tracy Simmons said...: Great post! We are what is inside, not how fast we run or what shoes we wear. Thanks for sharing :)
At March 16, 2011 at 8:56 PM , Jamie said...: I love #3 about basing self-worth on integrity. You've said that before in a post and I think of it often. So true! Thanks for being an inspiration in so many areas of life. :)
At March 16, 2011 at 9:00 PM , Jaeme + Randy said...: I have been wanting no bake cookies lately and I keep forgetting to get oatmeal at the store. Yum I want some! I definitely base my self-worth on stupid stuff. I stress about my weight basically all the time. Its really lame but its also really hard not to!
At March 16, 2011 at 9:03 PM , athletic chick said...: Oh Janae, I love this post. I can totally relate - I've been rehabbing a hip injury for over a month now, and can't run, cycle, or swim (I do triathlons). My self esteem has gone way down because (a) I don't feel like I'm accomplishing anything I can be proud of, and (b) if I'm not an athlete, I don't know who I am.

I think you've nailed it with finding self-worth in other things - as a believer, I KNOW my worth is based in God's love for me, but sometimes it's hard to FEEL that. I've also found that finding ways to love and serve others helps take my mind off my own woes and worries, and gives me something to feel good about.

Thanks, as always, for your awesome posts and your transparency.
At March 16, 2011 at 9:24 PM , Anonymous said...: thanks for speaking TRUTH. I totally relate-I gave up my scale for Lent because I was weighing waaay to much. One week in and I already feel freedom!
At March 16, 2011 at 9:26 PM , Mara Campbell said...: You have NO idea how this speaks to me right now. I am suffering from a torn ligament in my ankle and haven't been able to run in 5 weeks. My doctor just gave me a walking cast that I have to wear for 6 more weeks. Which means 6 more weeks of doing nothing. IT SUCKS!!!! I totally am that girl that wraps all her self worth up in being able to exercise and feel strong and accomplish physical goals. This is really testing my whole vision of myself. And it stinks but maybe it's not so bad. I'm trying to stay positive and find myself and be able to feel good about myself with other things. SO NOT EASY. Thanks so much for your post. You are the bomb.com.
At March 16, 2011 at 9:33 PM , A Big Little Life said...: Amen sister! I wrote about pretty much the same thing on Monday. Sometimes we need to snap out of the nonsense and remember what we value and what is actually important in life.
At March 16, 2011 at 9:43 PM , Katy said...: I love your posts! They are beautiful, and you such a beautiful woman, inside and out! :)
At March 16, 2011 at 9:47 PM , maureen said...: I have so enjoyed reading your blog the past few weeks! as you can tell from the comments above, 1. i am not alone in enjoying your blog and 2. you are totally not alone in feeling the way you do!
remember, this WILL make you a stronger runner. it just will. the times we have to pause and stop and reassess ALWAYS make us stronger.
i know it's hard but maybe getting back to basics with a long walk and some time journaling by the water or something will help soothe your soul. Also, random acts of kindness always make me feel better. even something little :) you're a superstar, you WILL destroy boston! :)
At March 16, 2011 at 9:48 PM , run4may said...: they look amazing and coming from you the treat queen I think I may have to try these out. Maybe make them with my nephews.
At March 16, 2011 at 9:51 PM , Muncher Cruncher said...: You are amazing.
I LOVE this post. You know how I feel about this subject...it's a hard one.
You broke my heart tonight girlie. I hope you know how much I love you. You are incredible. You are an amazing athlete and that won't just go away in a couple of days. You've worked hard. You are going to ROCK Boston. There is NO DOUBT. I love you to pieces chick-a-dee! xoxoxo
At March 16, 2011 at 9:54 PM , J. L. said...: You're so right. I believe self worth should only be based on how well we make cookies :)
At March 16, 2011 at 10:25 PM , Zaneta @ Runner's Luck said...: can i just say i love this post? Seriously... I've struggled with self worth too and thinking im not good enough... I feel like i constantly have to prove myself to myself AND others...
thanks for this post and for making us think about "grown up" things ;)
At March 16, 2011 at 10:26 PM , Shelby Lou said...: I too love this post! It is so inspirational.

What helps me remember my self worth is thinking about God, and how much he cares for me. I try really hard to remember that I have an individual worth that is different from everyone elses, and that he has chosen me to come here at this time for a reason that I can't completely see. Knowing that I have a destiny that is not created by myself, (because I am human and not perfect) helps me when I'm down.

Also, I talk to my mom and cry a lot. It might not help, but it feels better.
At March 16, 2011 at 10:30 PM , SRYG2R1 said...: Girl, you are the greatest woman I've ever known! (yes, I feel like I KNOW you! Ha.. I know you understand that)
I beat myself up over the most ridiculous things and say things about myself that I would never say to my worst enemy! I get so caught up with numbers and grades and it's good to know I (we) are not alone!
I'm actually going to print this post and hang it at work and home!!! You are wonderful!
At March 16, 2011 at 10:32 PM , ruth said...: i love love love LOVE this post!! Amen to everything here...

you are an incredible person, girlie, and I am SO thrilled that you have deicded to share so much about you. i think thats what I like so much about you even though we havent met. the way you write makes me feel like we have! :)

please please never stop blogging... i know it must take a buttload of time but i love reading your blog!
At March 16, 2011 at 10:38 PM , Nicole W. said...: I can totally relate Janae.
I too love how running makes me feel. the accomplishment ..feeling like I am the bomb.com (that is hilarious I just had to re-write it lol).....but like you mentioned,my true self-worth comes from knowing I am a child of God. When I joined the church 14yrs ago, my self esteem sky rocketed. I was so insecure and sad and lost and didnt' know who I was. as soon as the missionaries taught me that God was my Heavenly Father and I was His daughter, the light bulb went on. ....so I guess what I'm saying is I find my self worth there. the next place I find it is in my relationship with my husband and my children and being the best wife and mom I can be:):)
you're an amazing wise women....I think you're gonna be just fine;);)
xo
At March 16, 2011 at 10:39 PM , Pam said...: Janae, I just wrote down your recipe for those cookies!! They look so YUM!! Thanks! :)

I feel you girlie and you are so right on! When I was in my twenties I defined my self-worth based on superficial things...miles I've ran,scale,cute clothes,etc. Things that don't matter! But, you realize what REALLY matters. My husband always tells me "fine wine takes time." Wisdom, takes time to REALLY settle in. You are a strong girl. We all have our bad days but, also our good days!! This afternoon I had an opportunity to go for a run. I was happy,excited ready to GO! I set out to run 7-8 miles but, I experienced some serious side stitches and had to call my hubby to pick me up after only 3.4 miles. I was bummed! I'm used to running in the mornings and I guess my body was a lil' confused and didn't want to participate with what my mind set out to do. So my brain made peace with my body and it's OK. I know that tomorrow will be better. You will be out there on the roads real soon sweetie let your body NOT your brain tell you when your ready! You have a natural talent and it will always be there! Your rest days will only make you STRONGER!! mentally and physically!!

Love ya girl! Have a great evening!! xo
At March 16, 2011 at 10:51 PM , Jane said...: Hi Janae,

Love this post, it makes perfect sense to me. My weight is my major issue and it's what I base my worth on. I know it's wrong and stupid, but it's just how I feel. I will beat it, I just don't know when.

Don't worry about the tears as you wrote this, you weren't the only one. I shed some as I was reading. I love your strength and honesty xx
At March 16, 2011 at 10:57 PM , Trying To Heal said...: boom dog. you hit the nail on the head.

love.you.
At March 16, 2011 at 11:32 PM , Unknown said...: I am the same way. Sometimes I when I do not feel pretty, or I miss a workout, or like getting a C on my last test... I feel ugly, weak, and pathetic. But then I think to myself, I cannot judge myself because I am amazing, no matter what :)
At March 17, 2011 at 1:01 AM , Anonymous said...: So I've decided that I'm kinda obsessed with you (hope that's okay, i'm only semi-creepy), except I have one request. Learn to love your skin color! You're pretty much perfect (think about everyone who doesn't have your life, I promise they are jealous) and it makes me sad that you talk about your pasty skin all the time. I'm about as white as a person can be (Irish and Scottish all da way) and I'm finally okay with it (I'm 20 btdubs). If someone (usually my mother) comments on it I always think of these reasons a) because I'm faired skin, I'm a number candidate for skin cancer.. if I can prevent something like cancer, I'd be an idiot if I didn't try b) less wrinkles when I'm older! c) it's who I am and it makes me unique. Society is always telling us that you can make yourself better but by telling it (society) that it needs to shove it feels pretty darn good. Like I said before, you're have an amazing life (from what you've posted on here), great sense of humor, and a good head on your shoulders. In other words, yay!
Also I'm posting anonymous because I don't have any of the profiles I can choose from. My names Kara tho!
At March 17, 2011 at 3:34 AM , Anonymous said...: i love this post... i have been in the same situation.. i was just getting caught up in things that i was only proud of myself for the little accomplisments and not for just BEING ME.. it took a LONG time to get to where i am now.. and although my self esteem isnt perfect, its a hellofalot better!
thank you so much for sharing!
At March 17, 2011 at 4:37 AM , Erin@gosupermamago said...: Janae, Thank you for this post and for being so honest. I struggle with this all the time. I sort of feel like I have to be good at running, I have to play x amount of games, read x amount of books, etc with my girls, my house has to be perfectly clean, I have to keep my body looking good, etc because what else do I do? What else am I good at? I guess as a stay at home mom sometimes its easy to get down on myself about self-worth because I'm not out in society making a difference and bringing in the dough. Thank you again for this post, I needed it.

And for that cookie recipe, I'm going to make them today and the hubs will love them!
At March 17, 2011 at 5:24 AM , Rusty Shackleford said...: I'll just say +1 to what you said and leave it at that. Hope you are having an awesome day :)
At March 17, 2011 at 6:10 AM , Anonymous said...: Awesome post! I have problems on where to place my self worth a lot, too! Sometimes when I don't accomplish everything I want to do in a day and I have to not place my self worth on what I accomplish because to be honest I have lots on my plate! and then put it all off to read awesome blogs, like yours, and write my own!
At March 17, 2011 at 7:01 AM , Jill@Run for the Hills said...: Janae, you are such an awesome person and your happy personality comes through with every post.

I get down on myself sometimes too (I think we all do), and my best inspiration is my 3 year old. She has no worries or cares and her innocence reminds me that we are all innately good, just as we were created. :)

Think about all the kids in your classroom who look up to you and all your readers whom you inspire! You have, like, 1948 shoulders to cry on anytime you need.

PS. I found 100 calorie packs of Swedish fish and fueled with them during my long run this weekend. It was as good as I hoped. They are my ALL TIME favorite candy.
At March 17, 2011 at 7:24 AM , Unknown said...: Love this post.

I think it helps to look back on what you have accomplished. Running successes, times you felt proud of the person you are, the friendships you've built, etc. These are the things that make you uniquely YOU. So when a huge zit pops up on your forehead (which I'll admit is pretty devastating!) you can remember that the person you are has nothing to do with the tiny imperfection you see.

Things aren't always going to be amazing--swimming in money and running marathons in record-shattering times. But you will always be you. And you are pretty darn awesome, so celebrate that and never forget it!!! :)
At March 17, 2011 at 7:57 AM , Nicole said...: Oh Janae, how do you always know what to say at just the right time?! Right now I'm having trouble with predicating my self-worth on exam scores... I've been trying hard all quarter and getting very good grades but I'm horrendously hard on myself. Of course i probably should have studied more for the bio test I'm taking today but I'm just getting burnt out and it's my last one...

At any rate, your posts are always thoughtful and humorous and you are an inspiration to so, so many people. And I know you always bring a smile to my face. :) And ultimately I think that's what it SHOULD be about, so you are clearly an incredibly worthy, amazing person.

much love,
nicole
At March 17, 2011 at 7:59 AM , Matty O said...: Just dealt with the not running dilemma for 6 months. IT Band issues and other injuries have made my running almost non-existant.

Really messes with your head. Running is my meditation.

Keep your head up :)
At March 17, 2011 at 8:25 AM , Anonymous said...: I love this post! I am having issues with my scale right now. I feel good b/c I'm exercising and running more, but the scale says something that I'm not happy with. I really needed to read this post today. Thank you!
At March 17, 2011 at 8:34 AM , Emily @ eat.drink.run. said...: I love how totally honest and open you are. I think probably everyone feels this way but few are able to admit it (let alone blog about it for everyone to read) - but it is really something that SHOULD be shared with others, because that's how you work through it for yourself and by doing that you also help others! I think your list of things to base self-worth on are totally spot on. Even if you can't run for a few days/weeks, but that doesn't affect your ability to still be the good person you are, treat others with love and respect, and work to better yourself and the world around you. I've struggled with this in the past but lately have been turning to my faith and letting go and knowing that I can't control things - all I can do is follow His master plan and try to be the best person that I can, and to be grateful for all of the blessings in my life. Once I accept that I find almost instant relief and it helps me be happier and be better to others!

I hope you recover very quickly!! In the meantime enjoy the extra time to spend with your family, sleep, and do things that make you happy! <3
At March 17, 2011 at 8:42 AM , Jennie! said...: Totally agree. We are so willing to accept the "shortcomings" of others but are always so hard on ourselves. My husband has gained weight and I don't care, but I cry because I don't fit into pants I've owned since junior high. I'm 30! Those pants are out of style anyway! I always try to turn around those feelings, like reminding myself I gained a little weight because I have been making amazing food lately. It's hard though, and it's helpful to see other people being honest about how hard it is for them. Girls/women are expected to be everything for everyone and compare themselves to each other. Good for you for being so brave as to allow a platform for women, and just people, to share and support each other.
At March 17, 2011 at 8:51 AM , Marlo said...: Great post! I can sense my self esteem go down when i dont workout too.. I always feel so strong when i do.. and when i dont i just feel weak and lazy.. I always try and tell myself that working out isnt always top priority.. Sometimes life happens!

Those cookies look yummmmm!
At March 17, 2011 at 9:04 AM , Anonymous said...: Great post & very relatable. I'm taking the day off running today because super tight/sore calves & feel *guilty* laying in bed blogging & drinking coffee. there are so many other things to focus on that make me ME and I can't feel guilty about giving my body a rest.

Starting with making those cookies :)
At March 17, 2011 at 9:06 AM , Megan (Running Foodie) said...: I'm sorry I don't have a deep self worth-related reply, but I really just wanted to comment to say I thought you were CRAZY making no-bake cookies without chocolate... but then I tried them and they were awesome! My husband and I were both craving sweets last night, but we had no chocolate (the horror!). Perfect solution!
At March 17, 2011 at 9:20 AM , Shannon said...: Definitely a much-needed post. I, too, have been sidelined from running the past few days, and it just drives me crazy. I was so upset that someone at work made comments about what was wrong (though, to be honest, it was a bit more of an accumulation of things that set me off, but a long run fail set it off). Also, I'm having the hardest time writing a research paper, and it's really stressing me out and I just feel so stupid/worthless/lazy because I can't write a paper. Really, that is NOT normal. It seems I spend more time beating myself up over silly matters than I do anything else.
At March 17, 2011 at 9:27 AM , Caitlin said...: This post legit made me cry. I tell myself this stuff all the time but it really is powerful coming from someone else. thank you so much amazing girl, you are worth everything in the world and you'll be on your speedy feet again soon enough!! xoxoxoxox
At March 17, 2011 at 9:28 AM , Anonymous said...: very honest! great post!
At March 17, 2011 at 9:48 AM , Reannan said...: I can totally relate to this post, and absolutely love it. Your honesty and positivity is very very much appreciated.

You are such an inspiration !! and I love your self worth list.. espeially number one :)
At March 17, 2011 at 10:31 AM , RunToTheFinish said...: what an amazing response!! and you are so right that too many of us can relate to feeling bad because of the scale or a workout or something else that isn't a true measure of our lives
At March 17, 2011 at 12:17 PM , Holly said...: I love when you write posts like this- you are SO insightful- and as I have said before, beautiful on the outside AND inside!! Sometimes we all need this as a reminder. I know how hard injuries are, and how TOUGH you can be on yourself when you are not running...especially since a lot of your day is spent running or thinking about your next run.
Hang in there! I am thinking of you & praying for you :) (& that everything heals quickly!!)
Love you!!
At March 17, 2011 at 1:31 PM , April Castillo said...: I love this post.

This came at a perfect time for me, because I injured my leg at the same time. I never realized how in a funk I felt without running and sports until now, when I'm sidelined for two weeks. It's easy to be devastated and give up on the self-worth I've worked so hard to build...but here this post is, encouraging just the opposite. Thank you. Fantastic blog. =)
At March 17, 2011 at 3:36 PM , Becky said...: Wonderful post! I can relate to so many things on here. It is so easy to forget that we all have so much to offer when things don't go as planned.
At March 18, 2011 at 1:00 PM , Lisa @ Cow Spots and Tales said...: Just found your blog; love this post! Even though running is important in my life, my faith and family definitely are the things that I can always count on. I also may need to try those cookies :-)
At March 20, 2011 at 9:44 PM , Sara said...: Thank. You. SO. Much. This post is where I am at right now. I heart you - I really do! Thanks for keeping me grounded and bringing me back to what really matters tonight! You're my hero!!!!!!!!
At April 9, 2011 at 8:04 PM , Anonymous said...: Oh I can so totally relate to this. I'm usually okay with my body and my acne (By the way, I have two ENORMOUS zits right now! I thought that was supposed to clear up by age 28!). But I stress myself out and beat myself up about work (formerly school). I try and remind myself that my value as a person does not depend on how well I do at work, how many promotions I get or what someone says in my performance review. But I'm not always successful. Actually, I'm rarely successful. I think we all have something like that. So for what it's worth, I think you are amazing, beautiful and a just a downright "good" person.

Cookies and Self-Worth

Cookies and Self-Worth

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Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Cookies and Self-Worth

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